I remember....

I remember when the Mr. first told me he wanted to join the Army. I was 19, and after he told me I cried. You see, I was dating a goofy theatre kid and I never thought the military would be a plan (I should've...serving in the military goes way back on both sides of his family). I cried because I didn't know what that meant. I cried because I knew at the least we were a country at war and that meant he was going to be deployed.

He had just busted out of his cocoon and is now a beautiful butterfly.

I cried because I was a drama queen. (Seriously. Pulled my Gbig aside to ask her advice and cried at meeting. Drama queen).
Then that Summer he dumped me. I remember sitting in my sorority sister's apartment and watching chick flicks and talking about how he'd be back and he's just a dumb boy.
Then that fall he realized he's really dumb sometimes, and we got back together.
I remember doing pretty horribly on an assignment right after he left for OSUT (basic Training). I remember that professor pulling me aside. He'd never had me in class, but said that it didn't seem like me. I cried to him and told him my boyfriend had just left. He patted me on the shoulder and said his son had left too, but it gets better.  I remember that extension of grace. (And I remember that I was yet again, a drama queen)

Photo from Ciulla Photography

I remember after we got married, that I was so excited in April because he was done with school, I was about to be done with school, and we were going to be able to be done with long distance! (I can hear my veteran spouse friends laughing...). I remember him holding me when he told me that he'd be deploying the following month. 
I remember the joy of buying our house, and getting a puppy.

She's grown just a tiny bit...

I remember crying when the rumors of the next deployment came up.   I remember crying the nights before he left, but not at the parade field...which garnered me criticism. (Seriously).
I remember crying with relief to hold him in my arms again both times.   I remember the blast we've had on marriage retreats, at balls, and at Hail/Farewells. 

I remember falling apart on the drive away from our first base, our first home.   I remember crying on the plane to Germany. 
Why post this? (Other than to illustrate that I'm a pro-level crier/drama queen)
So often as military spouses we tear our fellow spouses down... whether it's that she's crying over him being in the field, or NOT crying during the deployment. That our civilian friends couldn't possibly understand what it's like to live through a deployment, and how stupid they are for thinking that a business trip is in any way equal to one. (For the record, most know it's nothing alike. They're just trying to connect on the premise of missing their person). What if we remembered how it was when we first started out? When that first week of him gone felt like walking through hell? The time we learned to turn off the news when he's gone? 
I have a feeling we'd be much kinder to each other. And in a life like this-where we are often uprooted away from family and friends, and expected to do it all with minimal resources- shouldn't we be more focused on helping one another, instead of laughing at or criticising someone who is just starting out, sad and scared? When will we, as a community, realize that our war stories are very rarely helpful?
I remember...the day I decided to start living in and extending the grace and understanding afforded to me many times over by many people.

Stuff

I kept trying to think of a creative title for this post, but I'm fairly certain there isn't one. 
I was SO EXCITED for yesterday- We found out our HHG (House Hold Goods) got here and would be delivered. Let me tell you... You don't realize how much you miss *your* couch and bed till you're without it for almost 2 months. It was even better because C's unit here is actually very understading and family oriented, so they told him to hang out here and help as much as he needed to, and even offered to reschedule his meeting with the commander.  I was so glad that I would be having help! What a novel concept. ;) 
As it is now, we had some losses this move. The lamp, tv stand, hall tree, and a serving dish are all damaged. Our bathroom things have been lost... so I'm out medicines, my makeup, and towels. I can (and will) be filing claims on all of it, but it just stinks to have your things broken! C and I have previously talked about replacing a lot of our furniture while we are here with good quality antiques.  It's just something we will have to keep up on--I'd hate to get to the end of our tour and not have replaced anything!   Today, We have people coming to pick up our rental furniture, so once that is gone I can unpack and settle more than just the kitchen. Looking forward to making this apartment our home!

Getting to know Deustch...Getting to know alll about Deutstch(land)

Last post, I mentioned that I had been doing a 3 day course called culture college. It was intense! 9-3 for three days, with about 40 of my new friends.  Day one: Classroom learning     This was an all day thing in a chapel basement with poor acoustics..not so good for the deaf girl. The information was great, however. They taught us a lot about German history, culture, and language. Our instructor is from Germany so she was SO helpful.      Day two: walking tour  

    So this was my favorite day, because it was the most applicable to daily life. From post, you can walk downtown, and we did! They took us to see all the major historical sites, some interesting  places to shop and eat, and some places that are just helpful to know. For instance-they took us into the train station so we could aquaint ourselves with how it is laid out and how to get tickets. Seems self explanatory, but it was actually good info to know.     Day 3: Garrison Briefing By far, my least favorite day. Is that bad? It was a bunch of the different offices on post telling us about the services they offer and what's in store for our post. I did love learning that there is a new PX opening in the near future! Currently, our shops are all spread out. The main PX isn't with the outdoor stuff, which is separate from the electronics, which is separate from the sports store, which is separate from the home store. It's incredibly frustrating-especially for someone like me who isn't driving.  I did end up winning a sweet BMW sunshade for the car because I can say 9:30 in German.  

  All in all, I'd definitely recommend this (FREE) seminar to anyone moving to Wiesbaden, or it's equivalent in other garrisons. Even though we've been here for a month and I thought I wouldn't learn anything, I walked away with a lot of good knowledge and orientation to the city. Here's to another couple of years of German adventure!